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8/1/17

Is It Pronounced Dairy Air Or Derriere Waves Revisited?

 

This is not the first time one of my favorite radio shows or radio stations for that matter went off the air without notice.  To this day I still miss the local music show Popular Creeps hosted by the one and only Mary Luchia on the late great REV 105.

However recently and very mysteriously the Philcast hosted by the biggest name in fox cities radio Phil Cianciola just vanished from AM 1150 WHBY.  Now if it wasn’t for our good neighbors Kathy Keene, Clark Howard and Bob Uecker this station would start to smell of cow manure.  Al

4/1/17

Edge Of Seventeen

 
It’s already April and am I still the only one writing 2016 on my checks?  Wait one moment while I reread what I just wrote.  I think I can answer my own question now.  No I am the only one still writing checks.  Maybe next month I’ll catch myself in the Stevie Nicks of time.  Al

1/1/17

Where You Lead, I Will Follow

 
Do any of you out there still own a VCR?  If you do would one of you be willing to record the Net Flicks miniseries “Gilmore Girls: A Year In The Life” and mail it to me?  That would really make me feel the earth move under my feet!  Al

8/1/16

Poloroirds Of Telephone Booths

 
I have yet to take a selfie.  Probably because I still use an old dumb flip Tracfone.  That being said... I have been part of plenty of groupies.  Now that just sounds worse than the photographs actually look because I'm a musician.  Al

4/1/16

Ground Control To...

 
The satellite known as Al Paul dot com was launched into cyberspace on January 1st 2006.  It's projected orbit took an unexpected path on July 4th 2011.  To this day all of the data transmitted is eventually processed.  Sometimes after over analyzing all of those scientific measurements the conclusion is as simple as this.  Just sing along with Ziggy Stardust.  Ch-Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes!  But what I forgot to remember was... there have probably been a few Spiders From Mars in your world as well.  Al

1/1/16

Wisconsin Happy Hours Begin With Whiskey Old Fashioned Sours

 
I'm here sipping two for one rail cocktails while watching a young buck chase a much older doe tail around the pool table.  And I can't help but over hear a regular in that southwest neon lit corner window office telling yet another local fish tale.  But this is the kind of place where it is still safe to leave your cash under your coaster while you step outside to smoke a cigarette.  Do you feel like you're sitting on that bar stool to my left next to me yet?  Happy New Year!  Al

8/1/15

From Baseball To Bass Player To Bass Fisherman

 
Talent to me is what I like to call the 10,000 hour rule.  That is practicing four hours a day five days a week fifty weeks a year for ten years.  My varsity coach back in high school possibly overlooked the next Paul Molitor just because I had long hair.  The rest of the Midwest forgave him because I became the next best thing to Bob Daisely.  The fish however... not so much!  Al

4/1/15

The Boys Of Summer

 
The Ataris knocked it out of the park with their cover of that Don Henley hit.  Well, if there is one thing Joey Ramone and I had in common (Besides our leather jackets, T-shirts, ripped jeans, sneakers and very short songs.) it was our love of baseball.  It’s time once again for me to replace that nine volt battery in my vintage AM transistor radio and Uecker it up a bit while hoping "The Igniter" can do just that to the fuse connected to my delicious Twinkies.  Beat On The Brat.  Al

1/1/15

Is Today Throwback Or Throw Up Thursday?

 
Either way... here’s to happy old and happier new years!  Feeling nostalgic?  It’s been 20 years since a couple of little ditties I wrote and played bass on (Because I’m all about that bass, ‘bout that bass, no treble.) first appeared on a various artists CD.  The songs that will make you want to stick your finger down your throat were "Poorly Writen Love Song" and "Science Fiction Psycho Bitch".  Al

8/1/14

Is It Pronounced Dairy Air Or Derriere Waves?

 
Ever since I moo...ved back to Wisconsin I’ve sniffed through an awful lot of radio stations.  But the two I always keep within ears reach are... AM 800 WDUX (They still pledge allegiance to the Hag.) and AM 1150 WHBY (A smorgasbord of local talk and tastes.)  And who wouldn’t appreciate a hot dish made from a good neighbor’s recipippa?  Al

4/1/14

Chrissie Hynde Sight Is 20/20

 
Let’s just skip to the end of the bridge now shall we.  One... Two... Three... Four...  Woo-Hooa-A-Woo-Ooh!  I’m not the cat I used to be, I got a mom, that’s 83 baby!  There’s no more pretending that I’m not standing in the Middle Of The Road.  Yea!  Purr!  Meow!  Harmonica solo!  Al

1/1/14

And Now For My Next Hair Don’t

 
Back in the 80’s it was “like totally” Aqua Net BIG.  The 90’s came and I just washed it a little less often.  During the 00’s a Clydesdale tail a Budweiser pony could be proud of.  Now that we’re almost half way through the 10’s I guess the only thing I forgot to do was... get it cut!  Al

8/1/13

What Are We To Do Without A 13/13/13?

 
There’s no Aaron Rodgers day this year or wedding vows being exchanged at exactly twelve minutes past noon on the 12th of December (But seriously… unless you’re in Vegas... who gets married on a Wednesday anyway?).  Myself… I’ll still start watching Spinal Tap at eleven minutes past 23 hundred hours on the 11th of November even if the calendar says it’s 2013.  Everyone together now hum that famous bass lick (No, not Big Bottom silly!) before you say… Go Pack Go!  Al

4/1/13

Something To Do With My Hands

 
I like it, love it and lust it when somebody actually takes the time to pen and snail mail me a letter or even better write a clam of a song about me.  Thomas Rhett you’ve just pinned the tail on the Jenny Ass!  I’ll return the favor after I slap this grin off my face and have a Beer With Jesus.  Al

1/1/13

From 10,000 Lakes To America’s Dairyland

 
The time has come to change the states on my old van’s license plates.  10,000 Lakes will now become America’s Dairyland.  After spending the past 17 years here in this my adopted home town Minneapolis I’ll begin to swim east across the Mississippi and St. Croix rivers to my biological unincorporated lake.  Al

8/1/11

One Rant And A Pair Of Pants When What I Wanted Was Four Of A Kind

 
For as long as I can recall buying a pair of jeans has never been more difficult than playing a game of poker.  Simply drive to the nearest Kohl’s grab a pair of stonewashed red tab 505’s off the shelf wash then wear.  What the F**K Levi?  Okay, to be fair I do have an irregular funny little shape but… four different pair with four completely different fits and not one that well… fits.  Wrangler here I come!  Can all you cowgirls out there say lift and separate?  Al

4/1/11

Gilmore Girls And Other Guilty Pleasures

 
There’s a rare not busy reaching to change the radio station moment when I’m alone driving my van and come across the Skid Row lighted cell phone waving love song “I Remember You” and then attempt to sing along with Sabastian Bach.  It’s almost every bit as enjoyable as watching Lauren Graham while eating Nabisco graham crackers.  Al

1/1/11

“These Go To Eleven”

 
I thought for a moment about waiting to post this until the 11th of November (11/11/11) but it made me laugh so hard I may have just squirted a little when I realized my music career has been a real life mockumentary.  Have a “Tap”py and healthy New Year!  Al

8/1/10

County Fair Concessions And Carnival Confessions

 
I still enjoy every curve on the same amusement ride I first road more than 25 years ago.  Her name is… the rock and roller coaster.  There have been detours driving downtown in Detroit Febrezed freshened floors in Fort Wayne machine musket mosquitoes in Milwaukee and Minneapolis piping hot pepperoni pizzas in Pittsburg and still the most memorable moments no matter how mammoth or minuscule have always been with you in those loops that make me want to puke.  That is what has made this ride worth so much more to me than the price of admission to this gypsy themed park.  THANK YOU!  Al

4/1/10

My Summer Of 69 Happened In 89 Or Was It 09

 
Paul quit Brian got married should’ve known we’d never get far.  Now was that Bryan Adams or Ryan Adams?  I’m so easily confused.  Looking back in the rear view you think I would’ve seen it coming.  I guess I was to preoccupied applying my eyeliner and hoop earrings with that very same mirror to notice.  Al

1/1/10

Variety…’80s, ‘90s & Today!

 
Okay, so this isn’t about my love life or meant to sound like a commercial for KS95.  It’s just that I used to enjoy waking up with a different woman every morning before pressing the snooze button and rolling over for another nine minutes.  But now Katy Perry, Liz Phair and P!nk have turned my already cheap alarm clock radio into one morning stands lusting for a toothbrush and a cup of coffee.  Al

8/1/09

Words, Whiskey And Wusic

 
Oops… the truth is, I don’t really mind drinking alone but singing to an empty room well… then I had this thought.  Maybe instead of spending your evening flirting on Facebook, MySpace and Twitter you might like to take your real life significant other out to my next whiskey a solo show.  Al

4/1/09

I Have An Itch Only You Can Scratch

 
No… not there or that kind silly!  Starting from scratch always makes me itch.  These first four or five shows are going to sound a little bit like poison ivy.  I’ll be yours if you’ll be “cala”mine.  Al

1/1/09

It’s 2009 And I Feel F.I.N.E.

 
F**KED UP, INSECURE, NEUROTIC, EMOTIONAL.  Okay, so that’s really from an Aerosmith cassette I recently PUMPed.  Sure, it makes me sound more like a drama queen than a dancing queen.  Now was it AIDS or ABBA that killed Freddie Mercury from Queen?  Mamma mia maybe I should just go to Dairy Queen when I’m under pressure.  Vanilla ice (ice baby) cream anyone?  Al

8/1/08

Two Thousand Ate Yet After Every Month The Days Of The Week Are Still Hungry

 
Life can taste as adventurous as a Las Vegas buffet at times but this year has eaten the heart I wear on my left leather sleeve out of house and home.  Now wait a minute.  How could that be?  I live in an apartment.  Al

4/1/08

Do You Like Cookies?

 
This semi sweet sometimes cynical singer songwriter is preheating the oven for a baker’s dozen of three minute morsels that just might melt in your ears.  Al

1/1/08

Ibuprofen Morning

 
Now, I’m not a doctor and I don’t play one on T.V.  Come to think of it, maybe I should’ve.  It worked well for Rick Springfield.  Anyway… just take two tablets and call me in the morning.  Here’s wishing all you Jessie boys and girls out there a Happy New Year!  Al

8/1/07

Gone Fishin’

 
Maybe it’s just me, but I’d like to see the motto on Minnesota license plates say… land of 10,000 bands instead of 10,000 lakes.  I’m going fishing for three minute long songs with guitar hooks and clever lines for you to sink your ears into.  Al

4/1/07

My Truck Is Broke And I Don’t Have Any Money Either

 
Does that sound like the perfect title for a country song or what?  If only I had a quarter for every time I’ve been nickel and dimed.  Well… for those of you who remember the (short lived but brilliant!) Repeats may recall Babe the Blue Box.  Now with 228,871 miles on her she will be going under the knife to become The Six Million Dollar Van.  I can’t wait to hear that bionic sound in slow motion the next time I turn the key in the Majors Lee.  Al

1/1/07

Songs For Sore Ears

 
This sight for sore eyes will be singing songs for your sore ears as soon as the snow begins to melt and turn to mud.  So this spring, don’t just blossom into a wallflower!  Bring your hoe (yes… I realize how that might have just sounded) over to my neon garden and help sow some new seeds (and probably pull a few weeds!) before the next record is ripe for the picking.  Al

1/1/06

Welcome To Al Paul Dot Com!

 
I’d like to personally welcome you to Al Paul dot com.  So kick off your shoes, step on in and make yourself comfortable while I stick a needle in the groove of an old Dean Martin album and mix you a cocktail.  Al